What is your hand worth?

Three numbskulls in South Carolina decided one hand was worth $671,000, the amount they collected from various insurance policies after sawing off one of their six hands.
Yep, one idiot agreed to have his hand cut off so he and his fellows could split the take from three AD&D policies; no word on how they picked which one would give it up for his buddies, nor if he got more of the take as compensation.
Evidently the FBI found out about the three stooges some time after the amputation and subsequent remuneration, Christina Bramlet of PropertyCasualty360 reported (in a pun-filled piece) on the event.
The surgical instrument of choice was – brace yourself – a pole saw. One of those long poles with a combination saw and lopper at the end for trimming branches in trees. No word if it was powered or manual…

So, walk me through this.
You’re sitting around with your buddies, likely a few beers into the evening, and you confess your deep sense of shame over your life-long-hand-to-mouth existence. Someone says he heard of someone else who collected big bucks from an accident where he lost his arm.

The lightbulb goes off...among this triumvirate, a rare event to be sure.
Then, the debate starts – no, it’s not “if”; it’s “who”.
How do you pick the unlucky co-conspirator? draw straws? rock-paper-scissors? flip coins? odds and evens, with odd man out losing his left?
Do you follow thru then, or give the unlucky guy a couple days with his soon-to-be-departed appendage, a sort of farewell tour. Maybe play a little baseball, tickle the ivories, tie a couple knots, drive a manual transmission car a few miles, button a few shirts, go a couple rounds with the ol’ pinball machine?
Or just grab the nearest sharp object and start whacking away?
And who has to do the surgery? Do both of the lucky ones agree they’ll do it together, to spread the guilt around, or maybe just see what it feels like to cripple a good friend?
Too bad there’s not a category for on-purpose maiming in the annual Darwin Awards...